Friday, February 01, 2013

NaBloPoMo: Kick Start My Heart

Hello there, lovely readers. I'm going to write everyday this month. Every single day. It's a promise I'm making to myself and to you. Oh, I know it's more a promise to me, but if I tell you to expect my rambling voice here every day then I feel obligated and that's good. I like feeling obligated to you. Now, I can't guarantee we won't slog through a few baby paragraphs instead of real posts now and then, but I'm doing it, along with all the other NaBloPoMo joiners.

I adore the theme for February, in corny Valentine's Day fashion, it's Love and Sex! Yowza. Some of the prompts are creative and just a little bit sexy, which should make writing every single day feel less painful and more pleasurable. And that's always a good thing. So let's get started. I'll try to keep this PG-13. That allows a little T&A and minimal use of foul language, right? Ok, PG-13, maybe a light R.

Friday, February 1, 2013 - When was the last time you said, "I love you."?

Joe and I are unsurprisingly those nauseating people that say "I love you" every single day, sometimes multiple times a day. I don't believe you can wear those words out. I don't believe you should hold them for special occasions like the good hand-painted rose china my grandmother rarely took out of her dining room cabinet. Love isn't a special occasion phrase. Maybe the first time. Maybe when you've worked up the nerve to say it while looking into the eyeballs of someone who makes your knees weak and your palms sweat.

Us, on water.

Maybe when you've never said it before. Maybe when you can't be sure they feel the same way. But once you've gotten past that first giddy, heady moment, I say, say it. Say it all the times you feel like it. Say it out of the blue. Say it when you hang up the phone with your sweetie on the other end. Say it when you part ways in the morning still half asleep. Say it when you're mad. Say it when you're so mad you grit your teeth through the saying of it. Say it when you're laughing and lighthearted. Say it when everything about your day has gone wrong. Say it. But make sure you mean it before you listen to my advice. You have to mean it. In your core. You shouldn't hold it back as punishment or as leverage. Don't avoid saying it because it terrifies you. Don't avoid those words because your parents rarely or never said it to you. They were wrong. They probably felt it everyday, and they should have told you. Because they did feel it, but maybe it terrified them to say it. Maybe they thought it would make you soft and weak. But that's a myth. It's a falsehood. I say it a lot. I mean it a lot. It makes me a happier, healthier, more open person when I take the risk and say it. Risk it. Say it. I love you.


bethany actually said...

My parents told us they loved us all the time. My brother and I used the ASL "I love you" sign constantly, especially when we were teenagers and it was less embarrassing than saying it out loud in front of friends. Troy and I say "I love you" all the time to each other and to our girls, and they say it back to us. I even tell my friends I love them from time to time! Sometimes that freaks people out, which is kind of fun. :-)

In other words, I agree with you completely. If you really mean it, if you're saying it because it's the simple truth and you can't contain it because it's overflowing and spilling out of you, you cannot possibly tell someone "I love you" too much. (But no air quotes, like Diane in "Say Anything.")

craige said...

Great post and so true. I also love that Bethany and her brother signed it to each other as teens. That is the cutest thing.

Kristendom said...

Sean's family still makes fun of us for acting like newlyweds because we say "I love you" to each other so often. I'm okay with that and probably always will be.