Friday, September 11, 2015

Take a Trip Into My Brain This Very Minute

Things that are currently taking up too much of my mental energy with wasted worrying:

am i ever going to catch up at work
my child's lack of vegetable consumption
whether the elastic in this expensive bra will last if I wash it in the washing machine instead of by hand
how much i can write about my child and this parenting experience without revealing too much, but this gig is hard and hilarious and i want to share without hurting the kid
my weight and my seeming inability to actually do anything about it except stress and my top button is digging into my belly button today and i ate the discarded toppings from the kid's pizza last night followed by seven Cheezits he spilled on the ottoman
my dog needs his teeth brushed
is there an actual Harvard Review or Lifehacker article that would make me more efficient with time management at work or would that just waste more of my time and i'd procrastinate reading it anyway
will i actually pass my huge expensive job enhancing CFRE test in two weeks
why do i feel guilty about taking a date night with my husband
my sandal is broken but i love it, so now do i repair or toss it
the tiny elderly lady who normally does any alterations for me isn't answering her phone. did she retire? is she in the hospital? did she die? will i ever know?

is there such a thing as a balanced life
when will i ever have free time again
why can't i just enjoy how clingy and cuddly my child is right now instead of feeling smothered
will my patience level ever increase
does anyone ever feel good at parenting, or feel like they're good at it for more than fifteen minutes at a time
should we get the kid a math tutor
why can't i manage to meal plan and prep for the week on Sunday afternoons
dying alone in a urine smelling nursing home
dying alone from sheer frustration while wiping up my ten year old's urine again
dying alone from the smelly force of my ten year old's well aimed farts
moving, will we? when? can we afford to? what about schools? what about kansas vs missouri? what about how the kid will transition? he has requested a bigger backyard and no trains too close and an upstairs, and what about how poorly funded our public schools are and the lack of diversity in other districts?
Man, I feel better already.

So what's running through your head today?


Becca Cooper said...

September is my month for anxiety. I've recognized that it happens, plan for it (cause I have to plan) and try to cope as best as possible but it's a countdown until October.

My brain today:
was it the right decision to keep daughter in online school
am I putting too much pressure on her to allow them to put her in high school level classes in 8th grade
my son is a junior
JUNIOR! 2 more years and you gotta find money to put him in college
he wants to go to oxford - ha!
if he can figure out what he wants to do
at least I have 5 years for sissy and her dreams of stanford
or 4 if she manages to shave a year off her high school career
he still needs to learn to drive
barn duty
moving barns
people will hate me at the old barn
people won't like me at the new barn
no social anxiety for you because it would make daughter's worse
it would be easier to move to our own place with a barn...can't afford that...unless i move too far away to borrow that horse anyways....
hubby's surgery is on tuesday
vacation time, hurry up and get here
who am I forgetting to call?
when are they going to do layoffs at work?
are they going to layoff?
have I picked the right 4h group?
what if robert dies in surgery?
what's for dinner because I didn't do the menu again!
i wish I had time to sew...or crochet...or finish knitting that blanket i started 2 years ago
I'd like to write too...but yeah, that's gonna happen
work potluck tomorrow and i'm expected to bring something...what???
would it be bad to get pizza for dinner so i don't have to think about it anymore
download school photos
share school photos so family doesn't think we fell off the earth
i'd love to see granny for xmas...not happening

That cleared things out a bit - thanks for the idea! Maybe I'll put this up on my blog and get some writing in and feel better about that too. :)

Erin said...

Damn, I need to get back to work, but I wanna read Kassie's rare blog post.
Having kids really cuts into free time. Or eliminates it.
Did my kid poop her pants at school again? I sure hope not because I promised her ice cream if she didn't and I really wanna get some ice cream.

Kristendom said...

Yay for blogging! I feel like I could write my own blog post about this very topic...
I should be working
but I want to watch Angel instead
and cross stitch
and read the new Christopher Moore book
why won't people order from my Etsy shop, but do I really want them to b/c how much time do I want to spend cross stitching anyways
starting a new video channel for student affairs
how do I learn more about shooting video
I get the house all to myself this weekend - should I binge on Netflix or clean?
god I need to clean
is it time to go home yet?
I want a nap
but now I have to go to a meeting instead